“Pacific Rim” Movie Review – Zombie Style

Full Disclosure: I may or may not have fallen asleep during the last fifteen minutes of the movie (I blame the pre-movie lemon drops). So now that you know I took a quick snooze during the most exciting part of the film, you can take this review with a grain of salt (a small grain).

Pacific Rim was pretty much what I was expecting: full of action with a unique plot, but lacking in character development. The story was fairly interesting, taking place in the year 2020, after the earth had been invaded by dinosaur-like monsters called Kaiju. Humans created robots called Jaegers to fight the Kaiju, which sounds simple enough, but the Jaegers had to be operated by two humans whose minds needed to be joined by a neural bridge. In the opening scene, the main character was operating a Jaeger with his brother, but (non-spoiler because it’s obvious) his brother got killed, and halfway through the movie the living brother paired up with a pretty lady to operate a Jaeger. Let the sparks fly! But I do have to give props to the directors for not objectifying the female characters (which is rare in action movies).

I have to be honest here: I only saw this movie because I love Charlie Day (It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia is one of my favorite TV shows). I did like the original plot, but I feel like the dialogue was a bit cheesy. And I did take a cat nap during the finale, but lucky for me, my spouse was able to fill me in on the ending. Pacific Rim is worth seeing because it’s a fascinating story and the special effects are cool, so if you’re looking for an action-packed summer movie, this one is worth the $12.50 (or whatever your local theater charges). But a word of advice: don’t load up on lemon drops before the movie, lest ye miss the ending!

Naturally, I had to insert zombies into the plot because I love me some walking corpses. But I thought it would be cool if the zombies were huge because the Kaiju were enormous, so it would have been a fair fight. If Pacific Rim was a zombie movie, this is how it should have turned out:

Turn: It would have been funny to see Dr. Newton Geiszler (played by Charlie Day) turn into a zombie. He was definitely the main source of comic relief in the movie, and I think he would have been a wonderfully goofy zombie. Charlie Day is known for screaming his lines, and it would have been funny to hear him scream-moan as a zombie.

Get Eaten: I would have liked to see Raleigh Becket (played by Charlie Hunnam) get eaten by a zombie. I don’t have a good reason for wishing him harm. I just like to kill off the pretty boys. He was the leading fella’ who spent most of the movie strutting his stuff, and I would have liked nothing more than to see him get eaten by a zombie.

Kill: I would have wanted to see Mako Mori (played by Rinko Kikuchi) kill a zombie. She played the main character’s sidekick/romantic interest. She was semi-badass, but I feel like they could have done more with her character. It would have been cool to see her tear apart a giant zombie with her Jaeger. She probably opened up a can of whoop-ass during the last fifteen minutes of the movie, but my sorry self didn’t get to see it. Epic fail on my part.

I give Pacific Rim 3.5 out of 5 brains.

One thought on ““Pacific Rim” Movie Review – Zombie Style

  1. Although we see we’re a little late on this post, we actually just saw Pacific Rim by way of Pay-Perview. Mixed reviews as Inion loved it and I found it a little cheesy. My only interest lying in the “pretty boy” Charlie Hunman. lol. When it first started of course we we’re like nooooooooo….. it’s always a bummer when you see someone hone in on an idea that you we’re sure you would launch completely unknown. Our protagonist’s name Kevin Yager. Yager being the American version of the German counterpart which means hunter. (And as you now know, Kevin becomes a Demon Hunter) But thankfully it is all they used of ours. lol. That’s happened twice to us this year. The first, being Pacific Rim the second being from your neck of the Zombie woods. World War Z when the word Rakshasa was revealed. A little character in our book NIGHTWALKERS. BUMMER!!! And everytime, we’re like noooooooo….. not fair!!! lmao. On a side note, I much prefer your take on Pacific Rim & wish you we’re writing it instead of the the ones that did. Sounds much more interesting & would have had us screaming, laughing & shouting, HELL YEAH!!!!! Thx 4 the stellar review as always, great job J. 😛

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